Dear Frankie,
Can we talk about LGBTQ?
Lesbian, Gay, Bi Sexual, Trans, Queer humans, animals and plants.
It’s actually better to talk ‘with’ homosexual and transgender people, animals and plants, as you will gain a much broader understanding of what these group of letters may mean to different people.
Any in depth discussion or casual chat with animals and plants however, may prove to be more tricky as they don’t have a voice.
For centuries neither did humans believe it or not, which was most unfair.
In some countries around the world sadly this is still the case today. I’m sure eventually, these other parts of the world will catch up, I hope so because homophobia can extinguish healthy relationships and in some cases destroy lives.
Most of these letters refer to what the dictionary describes as ‘homosexuality’
The term homosexual is probably not politically correct for plants, although many plants are unisexual with flowers of only one sex.
For argument sake, you might say a watermelon is gay.
In our closest primate relative the bonobo, straight and gay sex have vital roles in play, social transactions, bartering of food, same-sex social bonding and bonding between mating pairs.
Humans shouldn’t limit their thinking about the evolution of sex to its reproductive functions.
Understanding homosexuality is complex and simple at the same time, well it is for me. It’s actually when some humans try to ‘over complicate’ the matter that causes trouble and upset.
In modern times people are often asked to identify themselves into one or more of these categories. People are asked if they are straight meaning ‘heterosexual’ or not.
The confusing thing is this, it’s not as easy to identify people when it can take the person themselves a lifetime to understand their own sexuality or as I like to say… ‘compatibility.’
I ask myself these 4 questions instead.
Who am I most compatible with?
Who do I like spending time with?
Who has an open mind and is forward thinking?
Am I being my true authentic self?
I’m approaching 50 in a year or so and at this moment in time I feel I am most compatible with your Mama J who happens to be female like me.
In previous years of my life, I have shared compatibility with people of the opposite gender and a few the same.
Therefore you might say I was ‘Straight’ then became ‘Bi Sexual.’
I’m in a healthy, committed long term relationship with Mama J now, so you might say in 2022 I’m a lesbian.
This is why I’m a stickler for not labelling people. We shouldn’t put people, plants and animals in boxes, we should all just be free to express ourselves in a safe, kind, loving way and pursue happiness.
You shouldn’t ever have to ask yourself whether you’re straight or gay Frankie, just ask yourself this instead…
What would a happy and healthy grown up life look like for me?
…and don’t let anyone stop you living it.
Forever yours,
Mum x
26/04/22