Yo Mum,

‘Yo?’

I’m trying to be cool and down with the kids.  I found this picture of you here at the start of the swinging sixties, you’re 19, clearly a hot chick and rocking your beehive.

‘I don’t know about that Love.’

How did a cool Mum manage to pop out a nerdy geek like me?

‘You’re not a nerdy geek Love.’

I’m hardly hip and trendy am I? I’d live in baggy cardigans and Dr Scholls if I could. 

I used to tell the kids at Kingsway I was allergic to makeup and on ‘Own Clothes Day,’ I’d go in my school uniform still. I’m the worst and least dedicated follower of fashion.

‘You’ve never liked shopping I’ll give you that.’

I wish I did now, I wish we could have linked and browsed more, holding up hangers of outfits in front of each other, twirling and nipping in and out of the changing rooms with different ensembles.  It just wasn’t for me, I’m sorry Mum.

‘Don’t be daft.’

You always looked lovely and took the greatest care with your appearance. You never showed disappointment in me though, you always let me wear what I wanted. Even if half the time I looked like a boy.  Did you ever wonder if I was gay?

‘No, I didn’t. You were outdoorsy and in the eighties lots of girls wore trousers and had short hair.’

Would you have liked me to be more girly?

‘You were girly, you were my girl, I wouldn’t have wanted you any other way.’

I know I’m not putting words in your mouth because you always made me feel like I could be an individual, I could dress and express myself in a way that made me feel comfortable. 

Are you glad I didn’t go down the tats and piecing route?

‘That’s never been for you Love, if you had, that would have worried me more because then you wouldn’t have been being true to yourself.’

That’s true, just the idea of a needle puts me off anyway.  Were you not tempted with all the sex, drugs and rock & roll?

‘The music was fabulous in it’s day but there was no way I was taking drugs, that would have upset your Nana.’

What about all the sex?

‘Ooh Love, there was no sex before marriage.’

And then of course you only did it twice, hence Myles and me.

‘Of course.’

Shall we leave it there before this gets too weird for us both?

‘I think we should Love.’

Cool, oh and Mum?

‘Yes Love?’

You rock!

Love as always,

Queen x

07/01/2022